The Flowers We Leave Ourselves

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Black / General / Shorts

Rotting yellow;
on an altar of varnished wood;
you lie in wait for the rot to move,
onto the remaining length of your body.

The wind brushes against your papery skin.
You have no control, nor any feeling;
life is a ghost that has left you; in
what now seems like a shadowy shell.

What you are, and what you were,
now do not concur;
with the mass of yellow that you’ve left behind,
with no blood to use as myrrh.

–No scent to lighten your fear–
No scent to fuel those tears,
No scent-
yet you,
are forced to remain here.

Me:Time

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Mind Matter / Self-help / White

Is there time enough,
For me to sit,
and watch the browning of the leaves?

Is there time enough,
for me to sit,
and feel the waves wash against my feet?

Is there me enough,
for me to sit,
and enjoy the world going by?

Is there me enough,
for me to sit,
and allow myself to smile?


In today’s world; one that is so caught up with the excesses of life, charged with the inability to wait or be patient for anything, we are lost in a realm of superficiality that we don’t address or consider, and this superficiality –I feel– has brought our generation to a place where nothing is enough;
Love is not enough, unless your bedfellow is an aesthetically exquisite individual, matching your vision of the perfect ten.
Living is not enough, unless the life you lead matches the personas portrayed by other “social media influencers” and celebrities you see online.
Time is not enough, because it feels to you like an anchor, holding you back from the success that you can achieve if you just, “had some more time”.

It is enough, all of those things are enough and more, if only you allow yourself the opportunity to stop, breathe, and live truly in the moment that you are in.
You may have a hundred different spaces to channel your blame with respect to why you aren’t living the life you want to live, and be the person you want to be; but none of them are truly a hindrance if you put your mind and body on a path to achieve them; and all that starts with realizing your potential, and living in the moment. Your moment.

Allow Yourself Reason

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Self-help / Shorts / White

There are times of desperation that bring us to our knees.
And makes us acknowledge the hope that we need,
to make our faces up into a smile,
and have the courage to cross the Nile.

Allow yourself time,
for your skin to grow–
new layers atop your wounds.

Allow yourself illness,
to make stronger your frame;
and protect yourself from the unknown.

Allow yourself love,
to allow yourself growth;
for healing is at the heart of them both.

Love

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Black / LGBT

I wanted Love,
but met Rape;
standing in the corner of every bar.

I wanted Love,
but met Sin;
In every tongue that was spoken.

I wanted Love,
but met You;
who told me that I’m worthless.

I wanted Love,
–wanted–
For now I want nothing, no more.

For the anger in your eyes, and
the venom in your tongue;
brought a coldness to your heart;
but a richness to your guise.

Fooling me,
Teasing me,
To fall in love,
with Love.

Your lie was what Love was,
Is, and will be–
now, and until tomorrow,
when I find another he.

Winter:Spring

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Mind Matter / Self-help / White

Longing for Spring,
won’t make the Winter shorter;
and won’t make the snow fall any faster.

Living for that Winter;
when the wind is beating down hard,
is accepting the freedom you’ve always had.

Allowing that freedom to blossom and grow,
is allowing the aging of your body and soul.

Let the water in Winter,
find its way to Spring;
when the Summer allows for the thawing of things.

Let the dark of Winter,
be made bright by Spring–
bathed in the radiance of Summer winds.

 

Wild Whining; Wolf Whining

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Black / Mind Matter

A whisper, here,
to break the quiet.
To spark the flame,
and begin the fright.

A tear shed, there,
like a prayer in the dark,
to no one but yourself-
in the air, a bloody bark;

From somewhere in the woods–
the woods inside your mind,
where the wolves have come to feed;
a lowly creature whines.

There is no one there but me. No Devil to blame, but myself.
Left to suffer as a human being must.
Whining as a wolf, dying as a human.

Hard Rain

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Black

Voluminous black cloud that above my head hangs;
What has caused thy bloating?
Hanging so low among the mountains of my mind,
is it love that has sent you floating?

Is it lack of understanding that you’ve mistaken for interest;
or interest that you’ve mistaken for love?
For if so I must,
believe it’s not love,
but pride, that’s brought you here.

Voluminous black cloud that above my head hangs,
are you just my soul?
Bloating and growing through misappropriation,
of my body, and mind as a whole.

Voluminous black cloud, please allow yourself rest;
and allow yourself knowledge to know when to shed–
the weight you carry within yourself,
along the plateaus of doubt, atop my head,

Allow me reason to cry through you­
through the rivers you fill,
and into all the grooves–
that doubt, and hate has etched into,
the canvas of my mind.

Allow yourself reason,
to not look upon me with treason;
to not divide my heart and mind.

Allow your waters to refresh;
all that I have fleshed–
out across this season.

Form

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White

Forgive the sun,
when it shines too brightly;
for the days it has made you calm.

Forgive the wind,
when it blows down hard,
on the embers of hope in your heart.

Forgive the water,
when the salt within,
wells up aching tears inside.

Forgive the earth,
when it breaks beneath your feet,
and leaves you with nothing but dark.

To forgive yourself,
you must forgive,
the elements that exist within–
your form.